Bits & Pieces of Life in Japan

Every place you live there is a set of "new rules" or things that are typical for that location.

In Texas, it is totally normal for you to order "tea" and receive sweet tea. God bless that beautiful piece of heaven!

Traveling through New Jersey when you pull into a gas station, it is understood that someone else will fill up your car for you while you sit inside the vehicle. You will also pay less for your gas here. Go figure. 

Head to Germany and it will take three hours to eat dinner. Even then you will have to beg for a check, because dinner is considered a social event that lasts ..forever.. I mean, that lasts for most of the evening.

When visiting in Moscow, you better keep your head down and your smiling face completely neutral. Otherwise, it is obvious you do not belong. Russians don't smile at strangers. Come to think of it, Russians don't really smile much at all. 

Well, in Japan there are definite ways of life as well. Some I can explain because I've learned the background. Others leave me clueless. Don't worry, I'm used to being clueless in certain areas. It keeps me humble.

Here are a few random tidbits we have learned while living and traveling in Japan.

* Men are Hungrier? There are two sizes of meals for adults. A "male" meal is about 50% larger than a female version. The meals cost the same amount of ¥ though. Women are smaller, and they "want to stay that way", as one local told me. They considered it offensive when a woman eats says much as a man. They even have different size Bento boxes for making lunches to take to work. The female version is not much bigger than two kid's juice boxes. Oh, that's how they stay so thin.

* They are on the Move! Their homes are not only tiny (like I have explained before), but the homes are also multi-leveled. This means that no matter what the age of the oocupants they must climb stairs and move around a lot. They also eat while seating basically on the floor. (There are thin mats to sit on, but they are no thicker than a beach towel folded in half.) Three meals a day, for their entire lives, they do a squats to get up and down to the incredibly short table. When was the last time you do some squats on the floor to eat. I not even 40 and the floor is really far down there! How do they do it at 90?

* Working 9 to 105!  (No blog is complete without a little Dolly Parton reference.) There is no reason to stop working here. They will find a job, any job for any one who wants to work. There are people working the crosswalks, washing down the sidewalks, watching out for walkers when construction workers are digging.... You name it. 

They are greeters at Mcdonalds, which is said "Ma-coo-do-na-el-das" here ~ just to confuse every.single.visitor to the country. Every other country I have ever been to pronounces McDonalds, like we do in the States. Japan makes it a 6 to 7 syllable word end pending on who is speaking. I digress.

Allowing the elders of the country to work doesn't seem to be about money, although I am sure it is occasionally. Most of all it seems to be about giving the seniors a purpose. 

When they are not working, every senior citizen plays some type of recreation in their town. They are everywhere! They come out in hoards during the day when the children are at school. All the local parks and fields are flooded with crocquet and mini golf, frisbee and some game that looks like boucee. 

Seriously, it is like the whole town became an "active seniors resort"! I want to stop and take pictures, but I may not sure how well that would go over. It is a fabulous system to keep their elders active, healthy and challenged. Plus, they are plugged in to a group so if something went wrong people would know to check on the missing senior. Their population not only lives longer, but lives much healthier than ours because they move, work longer and stay more active. Lightbulb moment anyone?

* Sit Tall, but be Bowlegged?  What? Let me just put it out there. 

A large number of the Japanese women we see have wonderful posture sitting down. They sit so tall you almost forget how short they are. Weird, but true. In restaurants you can look around and not see a single female who is slouching a bit. As if a pole from the ceiling went straight down their backs, they sit that straight up. But, then it happens. They stand up and start walking. It is just a mess for most females 30 and younger. It apparently started when their desire to walk in ever taller heels. They "copied the runway models" and put one foot in front of the other while turning their toes completely out. They look like the "omega" sign when they walk. They are beautiful, poised and precise... while being totally bowlegged. I'm not sure why. I have tried to ask, but there is not a polite way to say this. Really. I've tried.
 

* Females lack a certain American "necessity". This is a little awkward to discuss, but in the interest of education I am going to tell you the whole story. We explore in grocery stores. You can find out a ton about a country and her people in a grocery store. After multiple stores and looking around for weeks I discovered a interesting factoid. This island doesn't sell tampons. I have no idea why. I certainly am not asking about that one! I an ag see that getting truly lost in translation. Just a random truth to share with the lady blog world. Another weird fact, toilet paper comes in scent and crazy prints. 

 

* Germaphobics Galore!  My sweet sister-in-law would love this aspect of Japan. They are Germ FREAKS! I say that in the kindest sort of way. 

There are sinks in all the resturants out wash your hands without having to go into the bathroom. Awesome idea.

 

There are also anti-bacterial towelettes given to each diner at every single restuarant. Ritzy places or hole.in.the.wall joint. You will have a towelettes. Don't even think about using that thing as a napkin. Not cool. It is considered "dirtier than your dog's bum" once you wash your hands with it. 

And, oh my! the reaction if something hits the floor and you try to pick it up. This has happens to me. Of course it has. With four kiddos and the clutze that I am. I dropped a coin. The scenario played out like this. 

Setting: a high-class food store where the food looks like it from a magazine. It is the quietest place in town, even though there are 35+ shoppers active searching for their next noodle or rice meal.

A young cashier attempts to hand me some change from my purchase. It is, of course, coins since most of Japan's money is coins. I fumble it before dropping a lone 500¥ coin on the floor. I watch as it falls and hear the 'clink' of it's metal bouncing on the hard floor.  

The world stopped spinning. As if you were a huge piglet headed into a slaughterhouse, the whole audience knows this is a horrible idea.  They are trapped watching you as you make a huge mistake. The entire store freezes and the background music stops. The people all reach to help you, but in slow motion all you hear is a faint, "noooooo". Your finger almost touches the coin as a complete stranger jumps on it. Literally.  The man stomped on my $5, as if it were an an the was destined to crush. He looks at the cashier and hast fully said something in a deep, guitar voice. She started digging out a NEW coin for me as she call a manager to come sanitize the old coin. It cannot possible go back into the drawer and infect the other clean coins. 

We got out to the car and finally one of the kids broke the strange silence with, "That was incredibly strange! Do they not know how dirty money already? Dropping it on the ground wouldn't even matter that much since you didn't plan on eating it or anything." (Trust me my poor sister-in-law is washing her hands at this very second just thinking about me getting a coin off the dirty floor.)

Japan is obsessed with clean, if something falls on the floor, you leave it there. A lovely worker with a long- handled broom will make it disappear ASAP.  You do not even look at it. It never happened. Kinda like me wearing neon Capri pants and rubber bracelets from my wrist to my elbow. Never happened. 

 

* To the Left, to the Left! You drive on the left. You walk on the left. You step to the left if it's crowded. You face chopsticks to that left. You go through the buffet line to the left. The buttons for the elevator are on the left. The bus lets you out on the left side of the road. BUT, when you are in Osaka, you stand on the right and the buttons are on the right. It is like Austin, Texas. They just like to be weird. No one knows why, but it's their "thang" so let them have it. Before you know it there will be shirts that say, " Keep Osaka Weird!"
 

* Men are not quite as manly as most Americans. I'm totally cool with my man carrying a gun, but a large, decorated purse on a male is just not attractive to me.  I don't have a single solitary word to say about that. Not. One. Word. Then, there's all the men wearing capri pants... Momma always told me if you don't have anything nice to say.... Well, you know how it goes.

*A Whole new Kind of Seat Warmer! It's shocking at first to sit on a Japanese toilet, but it really is a luxury. When you sit down on the toilet and the seat is warm, the music is playing and the bathroom is meticulously clean. Warm toilet seats during the freezing New York winters while trying to potty train would have been awesome.

* Basic Manners are Back in Style.  I know the whole story of why Japanese bow. Here's the short version. Back in the Samari times your neck was the most vulnerable part of your body. When you bow, you quite literally, show the back of your neck to the person. You are making yourself vulnerable and showing the person you rust them to not cut your head off. 

Well, I don't want to bring out the Samari swords or anything, but I would love for basic manners to return to the USA. 

When you check out here, after the money has been exchanged and recipt given, the two people make eye contact. Then, they both places their hands down and bow at the waist while saying, "Arigatougozaimasu". (It sounds like, "R-E-got-toe goes-zi-moss.) it means ,"thank you so very much". It is utterly surreal that something so small can make the whole day better. But, it does. That small gesture reminds both people that we are in this together and that manners make life easier. When did we forget that? They even have "guards" who keep the grass they are mowing from landing in the street. Crazy!

* Smoking, Anyone? One of the cultural surprises here has been the vast amount of people who smoke. It is like the 90's in the US. There are smokers everywhere, though you never see a cigarette butt. There are designated smoking sections at almost every location. Both sexes smoke, but it is primarily the men who smoke in public. All ages seem to smoke and ignore the health risks. It is a conundrum for me. Why would they start a nasty habit that even the crazy Americans are working hard to get away from?

* Progress is a Team Sport. Japan has issues. They refuse to acknowledge mental illness, the number of young people is not growing fast enough to support their huge, aging population, and they are running out of room in the most popular parts of the country. Cremation is required because they don't have the land to even bury people. But, and this is where the rubber meets the road folks, they are a TEAM. They consider the community more important than the self. They sacrifice willingly to serve the country and each other. They know they are stronger together. They disagree, discuss both sides and put it to a vote. Then, they get busy doing whatever it is the majority voted for without wasting anymore time bickering. Doesn't THAT sound like something America could learn from?

I love bringing all the little tidbits to you. I pray that your day is brightened and your load lightened as you laugh at my mistakes  silly adventures.

I'm more advanced than the Ape, but none the less, still evolving.

Covering the craziness of my Crew,

~Aggie Amy

Halloween for ALL in Japan

Wow! The Japanese are obsessed with most American holidays. I get it.


Still, I am shocked by how much they LOVE Halloween!  It is everywhere!  From restaurants to grocery stores, to people's cars and even ads. Way past what we even do in the US!

Here are a few pics from the local area of Nippon's latest craze.

The McDonald's in Japan goes all out for Halloween. The have a black "witch" burger and a white "ghost" chicken sandwich. The black burger has a soy and teriyaki sauce with nacho cheese on a black bun. The chicken sandwich has a white cheese and mayo on a white bun. Both are, surprisingly, tasty. (We don't really eat at McD's in the States. However, when you are overseas it is nice to have 'normal' fries and 'real' coke. It is not high brow, but it is as American as it comes.)

Kentucky Friend Chicken, or KFC to the kids and me, also gets in the Halloween action. They have a special 'Trick or Treat' bucket that is only offered the week of Halloween.  Good Ol' Colonel Sanders even wears a black witch's hat in the advertisement.  Yes, it is 1850 Yen, or $18.50, for six small pieces of chicken, two biscuits with honey sauce and two tiny fries. For a few dollars more you can have a tiny drink. This is why we carry water.

I don't even like Halloween. But, still the Japanese try hard to find a way to make Halloween "kawaii" (Ka-why-e) which means "cute" or "adorable".

Here is the local grocery store. They have a pretty good size selection of seasonal treats. There are pumpkin flavored Pocky, Milky chocolate in Halloween packages and cookies individually wrapped to be given out for Trick or Treating. By far, our favorite Fall treat has been pumpkin Kit Kat. It sounds gross. I don't even like pumpkin, but these sweets are a subtle spice cookie covered in white chocolate. We can't taste pumpkin at all.

There are small costumes everywhere! Mainly just capes, but they are everywhere! The costumes don't seem to be limited to young kids. Everyone gets in on the fun around Tokyo.

Ziploc puts out special containers this time of year as well. They just have to have Mickey Mouse printed on them. Mickey is everywhere here! That's what makes them adorable!

As you drive around town you see that most stores have some sort of Halloween decoration. You have to go so painfully.slow that you can study every business. Seriously, I go weeks on end without my car hitting FOURTY miles per hour! Weeks. It is NUTS!

Anyway, our local car dealer had a HUGE cutout of a large, white woman dressed as a witch. Our kids laughed at her every time we passed that store. I tried to convince them to let me take them inside to have their picture made with her. They were having nothing to do with it! They were nervous we would look like goof balls. Like that EVER happens!

The Crew is always trying to find a new toy or cool candy. Here they are discovering that Japan carries knock-off German kinder eggs! In Japan, the kinder eggs are called "Choco Eggs". The eggs are filled with Pokemon and Super Mario characters. Fun for my four!


 On Halloween night we got a group of families together for BBQ. That is how we roll on military posts. We party and enjoy each other's company before we 'improve international relationships'. How do we do that? Well, we let the locals enjoy some of an American tradition.  We had heard that there would be a LOT of Japanese children. Well, we heard wrong. There were hundreds- literally- over 700 Japanese kids who came through our little area. We were shocked! Each child would individually ask us, "Trick or Treat?". We would offer the kid a piece of candy and they would say, "Thank you" before they would move on to the next bucket of candy.  Several of the children gave US treats when we gave them candy. Typical "gift-for-gift" Japanese style.

The Japanese kids were incredibly polite. They were intimidated if there were American kids being loud or with scary masks. Most of the American children really behaved themselves. My kiddos did a quick trip around post and then returned early to 'help me' hand out candy. The boys ended up taking over and handing out all candy for over two hours. They loved it! They keep talking about how sweet, kind and quiet the locals are.


I hope you enjoyed your Halloween. Whether or not you 'celebrate' the holiday, and that is a topic for another day, it was a fun way for this family to spend some time with the locals.

By the way if you need any candy for the next few years... we are swimming in the stuff!!!

Lost in lollipops & ditching the Dots,

~Aggie Amy

My Jersey Boy's Birthday

I was going to write about the new Burger King Black Burger today.

I also wanted to tell you about a random meeting with some local women.

None of that is going to happen in this entry. I decided to share a bit of my crazy life instead.

I know, it's weird. It's just the way I am. Love me or hate me, either way I'm still me.

Today I am going to tell you about the love of my life and the horrible, no good, very bad gift giver that I am.

I try but I have never been a good gift giver. My husband is a wonderful gift giver! I love that! I can mention that I liked something, or even look just-a-tad too long at something in the store and a few days later it will appear. I have to be careful not to ask for something I don't really want ;)

It is very difficult to find a true gift for your spouse after you have been together for years.

I mean we share a bank account, so it's not like I can ever really surprise him.

I am always on the hunt for a new idea to show him my love.

If I am being totally blunt, my hubby gives me waaayyy better gifts that I do him. He gives me the one thing no one else can, time at home with my kids. He has encouraged and supported my desire to be the at-home-Momma for years and years. Even when I could have hurried to work as the kids grew, he let me find my own path.

I have worked ... some...off and on. I enjoyed it. It is just difficult to put my heart into a job and still have the energy and spirit to serve my family.

I admire the women, and men, who do it. You are stronger than I.

I want  need my own time. I like having the quiet house after the chaos of sending our brats to school. (It's okay to call them that when they are military kids. I am not criticizing, so no hate mail on that one. Feel free to hate mail me about the vast amount of other things I say that offend you.)

He has served his country since he was a just a teenager. Then, he went and married this high-maintenance Southern Belle. Poor guy. He must have had some inkling that I would be a little tough to handle when we were dating.

But, alas... He gave me that shiny ring.

He signed the papers.

He said "I do". And, he MEANT it.

When he said "for as long as I live", he really meant it. What a brilliantly refreshing concept. A man of his word.

I have put him through the ringer. I try not to... well, most days I try not to. Somedays I am not the best wife. Somedays I qualify for the 'she has gone and lost her mind club'. Then, on rare occasions he gets the idealistic girl he married. Poor, poor guy. He married a complicated chick.

So, as you can tell, my husband deserves a gift.

What do I get a man who provides selflessly to his wife, his kids, his friends and his country?

How can I tell him how much I adore his heart, his conversations and his time?

When I am perplexed, I look in that big ol' book of instructions. 

The Book says I am to love, submit and respect my husband. How do I do that in this situation?

I gave him plane tickets and kicked him out of Japan for a few weeks. 

Wait. What? 

My hubby is a total geography geek. He loves anything and everything that has to do with the study of human, military, and cultural geography. He is fascinated by people, their lands and their customs. He will research their religions and study their family structures. He gets into a zone when he starts to see the relationships between their geography and their traditions come together. 

Here is where we differ. 

I am... less fascinated.

I still really enjoy the learning side of other cultures. 

I just don't necessarily want to visit the entire world. I don't dream of seeing every battlefield, castle or church known to man. I'm good with some great 'tourist traps', a trip to the local grocery store and a stop at the McDonald's (Trust me, McDonald's is vastly different in every country. It's a great way to see the local flavor.)

But, I love my husband. I adore him, even when I want to bonk him upside the head with a balloon. I think he was made for me and I was created for him. 

How do I say thank you, or in this case 'Happy Birthday', to the man I have spent almost 2 decades loving? 

I had to find someway to speak his "love language", as the famous Dr. Chapman would say.

I gave him a trip to Vietnam with decorated Veterans and college students studying military history. He has two weeks to enjoy the wisdom of men who have been prisoners of war. He can soak up all the stories of Vietnam vets who are longing to share their memories, while they can still walk the battlefields they fought on almost 50 years ago. I encouraged, and then encouraged again, my hero to go. Now this trip may not sound like a good gift to you. But, it's not about you. It's about what makes HIM happy. So, off he went to explore and learn.

Then, I did something radical. I went on with life as usual... never-ending homework, way too many soccer practices and the constant line of dishes that mysteriously fill my sink. I fix whatever issues come up, take kids to the various appointments the need and plan a few gatherings in my spare time. I live. I don't hold it over his head that he is 'on vacation' while I am not. That would ruin the gift. 

I am not telling you this story to brag on myself. 

Trust me, I do wrong every day. 

I didn't even come up with the trip. I just heard him talk about it and saw a chance to give him something he would never give himself. 

I am sharing this with you to encourage you to love on YOUR spouse today. 

Come on, we can all think of one or two things that would make our spouse's day better. 

Does he need his clothes taken to the cleaners? His car washed? A love letter left in his dresser drawer?

Did you tell him how much you respect his opinion? Or how much you like it when he holds your hand?

I know marriage is under attack these days. It is hard to be married. Still, it is oh so worth it.

Are you giving your best effort?

Change it up.

Shock him - just enough to make him think, "Umm, now that's the girl I fell in love with!"

Isn't that good for both of you? 

Isn't that effort all you really want from him every once in awhile?

So, dust off your thinking caps Ladies. Start a new 'note' on your iPhone or bring out that list you always carry around. What are some ways you can make him feel loved today? 

A massage? 

A surprise date night? 

Tickets to the game for him and a buddy? 

A round of golf for him and his dad?

I can't wait to hear what cool ideas you come up with. 

So, off you go. Find a little bit of  love and cheer to pass on to that hunk you married. 

Let me go find that John Legend "All of Me" song and get this house cleaned up before my man gets home. He has been away too long. ;)

I promise next blog I will actually talk about Japan ... maybe 

Love to you,

~Aggie Amy