It is one most military wives won't say, but I'm a rebel.
We are at that point.
We are homesick.
We are longing for Texas Aggie Football, Chick-fil-A, and our fabulous Temple Bible Church. We miss our sweet neighbors and friends, our routines, and our wide open spaces.
We have moved 11 times in the last 16 years. ELEVEN times. That's a lot. So, how do we get over the homesickness? How do we make each new place feel like 'Home'?
The truth is we have a lot of techniques that we try. I wanted to share a few with you just in case you are feeling 'stuck' in your routines or bored with your area. You don't have to move 7,000 miles away like we did to 'spice things up'. You can revive your love of "home" in very simple ways.
1. Be a Tourist. We have meet countless people who don't know, or even seem to care, about the treasures in their own backyard.
Well, get off your duff and go explore! How can you love your area if you don't even KNOW your area?
* Is there a famous historical landmark in your area? I'm from Dallas. I am always shocked that locals have not been to JFK's Memorial. Really? Why not invest an afternoon and learn about the town's most historic event?
* Is there a restaurant that people from hours away travel to try? We walked into the amazing Gristmill Restaurant in the Gruene district of New Braunfels, Texas. It was so wonderful! I posted where we were on Facebook and was shocked that everyone else had already heard of the place. We had happened upon a famous landmark and not even known it.
We have moved 11 times in the last 16 years. ELEVEN times. That's a lot. So, how do we get over the homesickness? How do we make each new place feel like 'Home'?
The truth is we have a lot of techniques that we try. I wanted to share a few with you just in case you are feeling 'stuck' in your routines or bored with your area. You don't have to move 7,000 miles away like we did to 'spice things up'. You can revive your love of "home" in very simple ways.
1. Be a Tourist. We have meet countless people who don't know, or even seem to care, about the treasures in their own backyard.
Well, get off your duff and go explore! How can you love your area if you don't even KNOW your area?
* Is there a famous historical landmark in your area? I'm from Dallas. I am always shocked that locals have not been to JFK's Memorial. Really? Why not invest an afternoon and learn about the town's most historic event?
* Is there a restaurant that people from hours away travel to try? We walked into the amazing Gristmill Restaurant in the Gruene district of New Braunfels, Texas. It was so wonderful! I posted where we were on Facebook and was shocked that everyone else had already heard of the place. We had happened upon a famous landmark and not even known it.
Now, we try to 'stake out' new places to eat by using urbanspoon.com or other websites that recommend the 'hole in the wall' places that locals love. Hey, I never thought my kids would dive into sushi, but they do now! Then again, they think all pancakes should come with ice cream like they do in Japan.
* What about a new activity that the kids are a tad hesitant to try, but that they would embrace if given the chance? Have you tried the iFly places that let you skydive inside? What about the painting places that are popping up all over the US? Or the local theaters, craft centers or community centers? They often offer mini class sessions that teach you how to knit, put on a play or dance a tango. Come on and admit it. You have always wanted to learn a new dance with your hubby. Jump in!
2. Change your attitude. Ouch! This is the hardest one for me. The truth is my attitude sometimes stinks.
Come on, take a little walk with me through my day.
Imagine, I'm tired after a trying day. Here's what I would do to feel better when I was In Texas. I would grab some Tex-Mex (Mexican food for those of you not from Texas) on our way home from an event. I would chow down with the kids and talk about our days. We watch some recorded shows (DVRs are awesome). Then, I would send everyone to their own rooms to get some downtime. Finally, I'd grab a hot bath and a good book before I hit the bed.I loved it. I felt recharged after I finished this simple 'routine'. I felt like "Amy" again and not some alter ego who was ready to scream at any moment.
In Japan, most of that routine is not possible. Reality hits hard. Time for an "attitude adjustment" and a routine reinvention. Here are the 'tweaks' to my beloved routine.
a) It's impossible to just 'grab' any kind of food. It takes forever to get anywhere. Just running in and grabbing something to eat is pretty much out of the question. I can make some mean Tex-Mex though. It just requires some work and hours in the kitchen.
b) We still can eat as a family.
d) The girls have to share a room here. The boys have to share a room here. Hubby & I have to share the smallest room ever. So, clearly there is no sending anyone to their own rooms. Headphones are a requirement in this house!
e) I can get to take a hot bath. The baths in Japan are very deep, the water very hot. It's awesome!
f) I can still get books here. The libraries on base are quite impressive. They have the newest best sellers and tons of classics. Also, the internet is fast enough to download ebooks. Score.
Yes, my routine has changed. I have to adapt to the Japanese way of life.
Most of all, I have to adjust my attitude! The kids are watching. They will follow my lead. They will adjust their attitudes and routines, when they see me leading the way.
3. Find new Friends. Your new home will never feel like "home" until you find new friends.
* We start out by finding a new church home. That usually means going to several services and finding the right fit for us. In Japan, we go to a full Gospel service. It is completely different from our church back home. That's not a bad thing. The people are amazing and the doctrine is sound. The music is new, but the choir is skilled. The people are not afraid to share their hearts, say "Thank You Jesus" or clap their hands. They love on our kids, which is always a good thing.
* We start new activities. Whether that is sports, dance or whatever else the local area offers. One of my sons LOVES basketball. He was relived to know that they had it here. Well, when we got here we found out it was cancelled. Man was he bummed. It took him a bit to decide he would play soccer instead. We pumped him up and went shopping for some new cleats. He's excited and starting to make new friends.
* We volunteer at church, help out with Girl Scouts and host our new neighbors for a BBQ. Did a new family move in down the street from you? How about you take over some brownies or even those slice and bake cookies? I have been the new neighbor. The moving truck pulled up and the work started. Hours outside in that Texas summer heat. Then, like an angel, I thought I saw someone coming towards me. They were carrying... wait, what is that? Oh man, they were carrying gallons of Blue Bell Ice Cream!!! Seriously, they brought the new family ICE CREAM! They didn't stay or ask a lot of questions. They just left me with Blue Bell and their contact information in case I needed anything. We are still close friends to this day.
* We talk to people. Sounds simple enough, huh?
* We talk to people. Sounds simple enough, huh?
Well, let me tell you a little story.
We met a couple recently and the woman is very shy. It took her a few days to open up and ask us about something that had been bothering her. She said, "I keep thinking about you guys. I just have to ask you a question."
Normally, this is where we get asked about how we meet, or why we have so many kids. Or, we getteased asked about my hubby being shorter than I am.
It was none of the typical questions.
She asked, "Did you guys take a class somewhere on how to be extroverts? Or how to talk to strangers?"
Ummm... how do I answer that one?
Hubby and I laughed. No one has ever asked us that.
You see, we are both talkers and friendly. But, we decided a long ago that we wanted to value people.
We met a couple recently and the woman is very shy. It took her a few days to open up and ask us about something that had been bothering her. She said, "I keep thinking about you guys. I just have to ask you a question."
Normally, this is where we get asked about how we meet, or why we have so many kids. Or, we get
It was none of the typical questions.
She asked, "Did you guys take a class somewhere on how to be extroverts? Or how to talk to strangers?"
Ummm... how do I answer that one?
Hubby and I laughed. No one has ever asked us that.
You see, we are both talkers and friendly. But, we decided a long ago that we wanted to value people.
We had noticed others talk rudely to the waiter, act like someone not dressed in the finest clothes didn't deserve a smile, or use an attitude with a child. We had both seen it. And, we both hated it. We were going to put others ahead of ourselves.
It isn't always easy when we are tired. Or when we are new. Sometimes we want to stick out heads in the sand and hide. What are we teaching our kids when we do that? We are teaching them to be afraid of the world around them.
Instead, we make the effort. We push ourselves.
We TALK. We ask others about their
It isn't always easy when we are tired. Or when we are new. Sometimes we want to stick out heads in the sand and hide. What are we teaching our kids when we do that? We are teaching them to be afraid of the world around them.
Instead, we make the effort. We push ourselves.
We TALK. We ask others about their lives. We love on the kids in the neighborhood by giving them high fives or asking about their new shoes. We act silly. We let them be silly.
We teach our kids to talk to the new kids and to sit with someone who looks lonely. Our oldest son helped lead someone to Jesus at lunch one day because he sat at a different table where a boy looked sad. All because he had the courage to TALK to someone.
Now, this is where it gets sticky. We are very hard on our children. We ask a lot of of them. We pick up our junk and go a ton. We move acrosstown, the state, the country, the Earth every couple of years. If not more often that that. We make encourage them to try new things. They pay a high price to be 'brats'. Somedays they don't want to be nice. Somedays they want to be shy. That's okay too.
At the end of the day, the truth is moving is tough. Reinventing yourself at every new place, trying to find a new circle of friends so you have an 'emergency contact', learning to drive on the Left-hand side of the road... it's just trying at times.
Still, it is so worth it. The girl I thought I was when I met my soldier has completely changed. I no longer 'has to' live in a certain place, or eat at my favorite restaurants to be happy. I don't mind being the only Caucasian in the room where no one speaks my language. I can handle a flight on a Russian airline, a train ride in Japan or a bus to Poland. I am wholly at peace where ever I am because I am safe in the Arms of Christ.
I can conquer being 'homesick'. It keeps me pushing forward. It means that I have not worked hard enough to make this new place 'home'. I have work to do.
I hope that you have a passion for your hometown. And a passion for others. I pray you try something new at 'home' this week.
Truly, don't we all need a little more adventure, a lot more friendly faces and a dash of grace to get us through the day? Be that for someone today.
Just like the words of our closing song at the Gospel service each week, "I'll pray for you, please pray for me. "
Until next time dear reader,
We teach our kids to talk to the new kids and to sit with someone who looks lonely. Our oldest son helped lead someone to Jesus at lunch one day because he sat at a different table where a boy looked sad. All because he had the courage to TALK to someone.
Now, this is where it gets sticky. We are very hard on our children. We ask a lot of of them. We pick up our junk and go a ton. We move across
At the end of the day, the truth is moving is tough. Reinventing yourself at every new place, trying to find a new circle of friends so you have an 'emergency contact', learning to drive on the Left-hand side of the road... it's just trying at times.Still, it is so worth it. The girl I thought I was when I met my soldier has completely changed. I no longer 'has to' live in a certain place, or eat at my favorite restaurants to be happy. I don't mind being the only Caucasian in the room where no one speaks my language. I can handle a flight on a Russian airline, a train ride in Japan or a bus to Poland. I am wholly at peace where ever I am because I am safe in the Arms of Christ.
I can conquer being 'homesick'. It keeps me pushing forward. It means that I have not worked hard enough to make this new place 'home'. I have work to do.
I hope that you have a passion for your hometown. And a passion for others. I pray you try something new at 'home' this week.
Truly, don't we all need a little more adventure, a lot more friendly faces and a dash of grace to get us through the day? Be that for someone today.
Just like the words of our closing song at the Gospel service each week, "I'll pray for you, please pray for me. "
Until next time dear reader,
Talk to a Stranger & Love on Your Neighbors,
~Aggie Amy
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